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The holidays are upon us once again. While there is hope for better times each and every year, for many, Christmas is a time of depression, pain, isolation and an inability to feel or to engage in all that is represented as "joy".
So much of this holiday has become commercialized. Not just commercialized in terms of the push to buy material things but also commercialized in the sense that this is a time when "everyone" is with family and friends, in cozy warm living rooms with huge trees, smiling faces and warm fires in beautifully decorated fire places.
This has become a "media image". Does it exist? Well, for some surely, if they are that lucky, that fortunate and depending upon their childhood experience and their family of origin.
For many more though, Christmas can't rise to the expectations of "everyone" in our own personal lives. Maybe we've not experienced a caring healthy family. Perhaps you grew up in an abusive home. You may have lost a loved one or had a relationship break-up at this time of year.
Everything at Christmas, emotionally, is so magnified out of proportion. Lost is the true meaning of it all to and for those who are Christian.
Give yourself permission to be wherever this Christmas finds you, be that with others, happy or sad, or alone.
Don't buy into the "everyone else" out there. There is no such thing. There are endless happy happy commercials but truthfully finding out from the inside out what this holiday means to you and taking gentle care of yourself in
affirming ways is really what matters most.
It is okay to be alone. It is okay if you are not happy. It is okay if there is more pain at this time of year. Accepting who you are and where you are at this time of year can make it the kind of holiday that you need it to be.
Empower yourself. Affirm yourself. Think positive and caring thoughts about yourself. If you are alone, know that millions are also alone. You are not the only one.
If you have a friend or family or lots of people to share this holiday with don't lose yourself to the commercialized stress-filled materialistic stereotype.
Enjoy or endure this Christmas as the case may be. Do so from your heart and your base of faith.
Give yourself permission to be wherever you are and to not feel bad about that. Make healthy and meaningful choices. Love yourself.
Copyright (C) 2004 Ms. A.J. Mahari
(soulselfhelp@rogers.com)
(www.soulselfhelp.on.ca)
All rights reserved.
CHRISTMAS
"Don't be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones tend to take care of themselves."
Dale Carnegie
Theodore Roosevelt, a staunch conservationist, banned Christmas trees in his home, even when he lived in the White House. His children, however, smuggled them into their bedrooms.
